Switched: Rewritten
by Moogiuh
Summary: When Master and Crazy Hand go on vacation, the Smashers find a machine that lets them swap bodies with any other Smasher. What crazy things will they get into when the hands are away? A Rewrite of my story, Switched, back when I was a huge noob!


_The Smash Mansion is quite a marvellous place. No matter how confident you are that you've seen every room to this complex build, someone else will find a hidden passageway. One of those hidden passages, hidden under a washing machine in the Mansion's basement, holds some of the most deadly weaponry, tools, and machines known to video game-kind. Many of these were built by the one and only Crazy Hand, younger brother and assistant to Master Hand; the leader of the Smash Bros. Being the 'crazy' hand he is, he locked these up for absolutely no reason and completely forgot about them._

_Some of these weapons are even more powerful than an atomic bomb. Some barely leave a scratch on you. But, there's one in particular that had no purpose in harming people. He called it the Body Switcheroonie -1235. When two living creatures entered the box-like machine and pressed the purple button inside of it, they would be ripped from their own body and thrusted into the other's. No one would know you weren't really that person until you spoke out loud, as your original voice would be taken with you to the other body. This one flaw was impossible for Crazy to solve, so it too was locked up. Even if it was successful, it was merely an experiment he believed had no purpose other than to be a prank. And that is exactly what one troublemaking, ignorant Smasher by the name of Wolf O' Donnell thought as well.

* * *

_

Master Hand couldn't stop taking glances at the odd machine in his office. The dull, grey box was about Bowser's size and height, and as of most recent, it had just appeared on the wooden floor beside his desk. He didn't know who put it there or how it had ever got inside the Smash Mansion in the first place, but he was determined to find out what it did... after his vacation.

"HeY, wHeRe DiD yOu GeT tHaT mAcHiNe?" Crazy Hand asked as he crashed through the wall to the office. Right beside the hand shaped hole was the door, big enough to fit a truck through.

"Brother, that's the third time this week you've done that! Why don't you just use that huge door I implemented for a reason?" Master clenched himself into a fist. "You know I don't have the money OR time to fix it over and over again!"

"uHh... BeCaUsE iT's... ToO nOrMaL."

"Too normal? Why don't you just learn a bit about sanity for once? I would tolerate you so much more if you could see what being the Right Hand is all about... HEY! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?"

"tHaT mAcHiNe LoOkS nOsTaLgIc To Me."

"...are you sure you didn't put that box there?"

"DoN't ThInK sO."

"Hm... sounds like a lot of bull to me-" before Master could finish his sentence, someone knocked on the door, to the tune of 'I'm a Little Teapot'. "Come in," he grumbled.

"Hello, Master Handy Dandy!" Peach grinned, holding a tray in her arms. "I brought you some coffee!"

_Ugh, not her. Just.. not her._ "First off, Pineapple Princess-"

"Peach! Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom!"

"Yes, whatever. Peach, first thing you should know: Hands can't drink coffee."

"oH yEs ThEy CaN!" Crazy's pinky finger carefully grabbed the small coffee cup. Unsure what to do with it, he smashed it over himself. "fUn FuN!"

"Ahem. Secondly, do NOT, I repeat, do NOT CALL ME HANDY DANDY!"

"...is there anything you need, Handy Dandy?" Peach continued her streak of cheerfulness, not realizing she had just been yelled at. Master Hand, with hesitation, looked at the machine, then back at her. He was unsure whether to trust Peach, a foolish princess girl, with some stupid machine he believed Crazy had just implemented into the room. After much thought, he found his decision.

"Well, if you can watch over this machine while Crazy and I go away for a month without touching it, then yes, there is something I need!" The giant hand continued to watch her expression. She was beaming like a lightbulb.

"Of course I will, Handy Dandy! Just eave it to me!" Peach shoved past him and sat on one of his office chairs. "You can trust me!"

Master cackled for a second. "Ah, but only if you stop calling me that horrifying nickname."

"...fiiiiiinneee." What once beamed now seemed stale as she frowned.

"Then it's settled. If anything happens though, you'll be on garbage duty for the rest of eternity!"

"MmMmMmMmM... gArBaGe!"

"Just get over here, Crazy." The two hands took one last look at Master Hand's office before shutting the door behind them. Unknown to them was the insanity that was to happen through that whole month they were gone, and maybe even longer.

* * *

One of the many rooms in the Smash Mansion was a gaming room, a large one at that. It included many types and variations of Nintendo consoles, and this was just the place to go if one of your personal consoles had broken down. To the dismay of Snake and Sonic, they didn't supply Playstations, Xboxs or any sort of Sega console.

It seemed creepy to some of the Smashers that they were playing events that once happened in their lives, but some absolutely loved it. Pit was, by all means, in the latter category. He couldn't stop playing Kid Icarus on one of the NES systems if his life depended on him. He was close to Medusa, and even though he had beaten her over and over again, he enjoyed it anyway.

"Yo, Pit!" Pokemon Trainer Red approached the angel. Pit didn't seem to notice him, and continued to play. "Pause the darn game and look over here!" The game made a noise, and the game paused.

"Red, what do you want? I'm kinda busy here, man!" Pit glared at him with the angriest face he could put on.

"Yeah... how intimidating..." he giggled. "Anyway, I need you to do me a favour."

"What _kind _of favour?" Pit asked wearily. "Is it something along the lines of 'Potty Train Ivysaur?' Believe me, it was painful enough to teach Charizard how to fly and not glide. How about-"

"No, silly! I just need you to keep an eye out on Squirtle. You see, I accidentally lost his Pokeball in the lake... and since I don't have any extras, I need to make sure he doesn't escape while I'm out buying more!" Before Pit could reject, Red handed him Squirtle and left through the front door of the Mansion, only centimetres away from where he stood.

"Wait... is it even possible to lose your own Pokemon's Pokeball? Or is this some lame joke this author person came up with?" Pit sighed, shaking his head, a little afraid at what could happen next. "Whatever, I guess I'm stuck with his Squirtle."

"Squirtle Squirt..." The Pokemon moaned. He didn't look too happy to be away from his Trainer. Unsure what to do, Pit carried him to the dining room. To his relief, the door leading out of the Games Room led right to it. Many of the Smashers were already eating lunch, all sitting in no particular order. That's what he liked about the Smash Mansion; there was no discrimination towards each species. He could easily hang out with someone like Marth, then go to someone like Jigglypuff and Pikachu next. Pit sat down between Young Link and Ness. Lucas sat across from Ness, and Popo sat across from Young Link.

"Hey, Pit! Why are you holdin' Red's Squirtle? Stole him, I presume?" Popo asked, snickering. Pit shook his head, hesitantly and angrily. Him and Popo never really got along, and both argued quite a lot.

"For your information, he told me to watch it while he was gone-"

"No way!" Popo interrupted. "You stole him, and I'm gonna prove that to 'im!" He took out his hammer and hit the table. Plates scattered across the room, food flying at Smasher's faces. It had startled Squirtle so much he leaped out of Pit's grasp and fled the room. Everyone in the room began to yell at Popo.

"Hey, Squirtle! **WAIT**!" Pit flung out from his seat and charged towards the Pokemon. He leapt in the air, gliding towards his target. He hadn't realized where he was going before finally catching Squirtle. The two went flying and bashed through Master Hand's office door, causing it to fall over, and crashed into Peach, busy setting up and watering a few plants. She hit off of Master Hand's desk, dazed. As Pit slowly got up onto the ground, she realized what had happened.

"_**PIT! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST BARGE INTO HIS OFFICE LIKE THIS?**_" Peach yelled at the top of her lungs. Startled, Squirtle hopped up onto her had, causing her to shriek and leap high.

"Squiiiiiiiiiirr rrrrttttttlllll lleeeeee!" Squirtle screeched as Peach flung him back into the desk. He didn't seem unconscious, but he was certainly dizzy. Pit and Peach stared at each other for a long minute. Finally, Pit turned his attention to the machine, whose door was open, behind her.

"Ooh! What's that?" He asked, grinning evily. "Can I look at it?" Angered at his curiosity, she slapped him hard, making his cheek feel like it was burning. "I... think I can take that as a no... but what does it do-"

"I dunno? And even if I did, I certainly wouldn't tell you now!" She pulled her frying pan out from space. She was about to swing down at his head when Squirtle let out a battle cry. He got up yet again and attacked Pit's legs with his tail. The angel bumped into Peach, and the two tumbled into the machine.

"Ack! We've gotta get out!" Peach tried to climb out, but Pit held her back. Eyes sparkling, he closed the door, and pressed the first button he felt. The machine stirred and shook before a light flashed and flickered, before the entire room went back into darkness.

* * *

"Ike, do you know where Pit went?" Roy ran up to the spiky blue haired swordsman. He was still sitting at the dinner table, simply waiting for his next Team Battle with Marth, who sat right beside him. He looked up from his Nintendo DS. "Oh, I haven't seen him since he ran after Squirtle."

"Watashi wa pitto wa daijōbudearu koto o negatte imasu. Kare wa, tsūjō, kon sumasshuburazāzu X no kenri no tame ni watashi-tachi ni chōsen suru tēburu o kakonde jikkō shite iru!" Marth exclaimed.

"What'd you say?" Ike groaned. He despised it when Marth spoke Japanese, only due to his lack of Japanese knowledge.

"I said, I hope that Pit is alright. He's usually running around the table challenging us for a Brawl right now!" Marth translated himself, sounding impatient. Ike hit him with a friendly punch.

"Can't blame me for not knowing any Japanese! Still, it is a question... where is he?" A sudden shriek pierced the room and the hallway down. The Smashers became silent.

"What was-a that?" Luigi asked, breaking the silence with a mouthful of spaghetti in his mouth.

"Lemme find out!" Young Link raised himself from his chair, a look of bravery on his face.

"No, I wanna find out! Besides, I'm better than you!" Toon Link got up as well. Young only scowled.

"No you're not!"

"Yes I am!"

"Ugh, you both can go find out all you want!" Zelda groaned, trying to eat a bowl of soup in peace. The two Links gave each other a dirty look before running down the hallway, towards Master Hand's office.

* * *

"_AGH! I FEEL SO... GIRLY!_" Pit exclaimed as he felt his suddenly bumpy chest area. Everything felt different, but his voice remained the same. "What the heck happened?" He looked over at what should've been Peach and gasped. She was now in his body.

"Why do I feel so... manly?" Peach began to feel her entire body with her hands. It seemed a little more muscular. Slowly, Pit approached her and, for the fun of it, slapped her really hard.

"Ouch, Pit! Why'd you do that...eek!" Peach stumbled backwards as she saw Pit in her body, ready to extract his leg at her. "What happened?"

"Hm, maybe that machine swaps bodies! Dunno what the point is, but this seems cool!" Pit skipped around the office, while Peach stood still for a brief moment. She contemplated the thought of being Pit before finally realizing something. His wings.

"So, Pit, if you'll excuse me... I'm gonna go FLY!" She ran right past the two Links as she headed for the Mansion's front door.

"Wow, Pit seems really excited for some reason." Young and Toony exchanged glances, before noticing 'Peach' walking out of the office.

"MISS PEACH!" Toon Link yelled as he ran towards her, sort of glad to see she was fine. What was actually Pit stumbled over, falling flat on his chest. He moaned in pain.

"We were wondering what that screech was!" Young had finally caught up to Toony. The two looked at the princess flat on 'her' chest, and began to chuckle.

"What a scaredy cat! Man, she just keeps getting blonder by the second!" Toony grinned proudly. Pit's face turned red. Now that he was Peach, he knew it would be fun to mess with people. Getting up from where he lay, he used the highest voice possible to make himself more like Peach.

"**Links!** What would make you _NOT_ respect your caretaker?" He shrieked. Toony backed into Young Link. "Why would you treat the simply AMAZING cook like this when all she does is care for you!"

"Er.. Miss, we, I mean, I.. well-" Young Link shuddered.

"_**THIS IS NOT HOW YOU TREAT PEOPLE!**_"

"Ack! We're very sorry, Miss Toadstool!" Toony's eyes shut, preparing for what was to happen.

"Thank you. Now, if you want to have dessert tonight..." Pit's eyes widened.

"Yes, Miss Toadstool, what is it, Miss Toadstool?" Toony and Young Link looked at each other with scared looks on their faces. _What if she makes us clean the bathrooms? Or.. or..._

"Hm... _get back in the kitchen and make me a sammich!_" Pit held back from laughing, as he exclaimed an overrated line.

"Yes, Miss Toadstool, right away, Miss Toadstool!" The two Links hurried back into the living room, and into the kitchen, where they began to cut bread and other ingredients. When he knew he was by himself, Pit smiled as he brushed blonde hair from his face.

"That. Was. EPIC WIN!" With glee, he hurried into the kitchen with the Links and began to prepare desserts for the Smashers. A few glanced over, confused.

"What the heck... are the Links making a sandwich for _Peach_?" Zelda scratched her head.

Link shrugged. "Who knows.. maybe they were threatened?"

"Hm.."

* * *

"So, you are... Peach, not Pit?" Red was surprised to see 'Pit' about to jump off of the roof of the Smash Mansion. He had just returned from a Poke Center, with a new Pokeball for Squirtle. "Anyway, do you know where Squirtle is?"

"Dunno," Peach shrugged. "I last saw him in Master Hand's office, but he's probably ran off by now." She gulped, looked down at the height below.

"You're joking about attempting to fly, right?" Red sighed, hoping she'd say yes. "Just some prank you're trying to pull?"

"Heck no! I'm gonna try to fly no matter what!" Peach extracted her wings as she glided off of the building. She screamed as she swooped down right over Red's head, causing his hat to sweep away with her.

"Oh gosh... Peach!" Red ran, trying to catch up with her. Swiftly, she dodged a tree and began to fly a little higher every second. It could go without saying for anyone, but she could barely believe she was flying.

"Wooooooooohooooooooo!" Peach's enthusiasm was definitely present in her voice as she did a U-Turn around a bush. She tried to slow down her flight to land, but as she tried, she bashed into Red and the two fell over. For a moment they simply sat, before both began to laugh.

"Man, that looked AWESOME!" Red and Peach danced around the fields before they heard muttering and footsteps approaching.

"Pit! Are you okay?" As Lucario approached the duo, he sensed their auras. _Wait a minute,_ Lucario realized. _Isn't Pit's aura a little bit darker?_

"Aw, jeez Peach, that was AMAZING!" The two of them couldn't stop laughing. Lucario gasped, causing the angel to glance at him.

"**P-P-PEACH?**"

* * *

"So you are-a saying that the machine in-a Master Hand's room swaps-a bodies?" Mario asked the two upset Smashers at the dinner table. Pit had messed up badly on the chocolate ice cream by putting them in the oven by accident. Without a doubt, the Smashers had noticed.

"Well, er, I guess you could say that.." Pit said through bites of the sandwich Toony and Young had made him.

"Look, Mario, sweetie, this machine isn't dangerous, I mean-"

"Peach, look! You could've-a died from flying off-a Smash Brothers. It's-a not hard to-a say that was-a simply _horrifying!_" It almost broke his heart to see his supposed girlfriend in some guy's body and **enjoying it.** He just couldn't take it anymore.

"Mario, this could pose as a new interesting thing for Smashers to do. I mean, being able to be your friend for a day or two is pretty cool, you know.." Pit's eyes gleamed, a little nervous as to what he'll say. Mario took this into consideration. Thinking it over, he finally made his decision

"Fine. Until Master Hand gets-a back, Smashers can-a go into the machine-a and test it out-a. _But_-" Mario emphasized 'but' as much as he could. "-but if anything-a disturbing happens, we will-a have to destroy the machine-a. Well, after everyone is in their-a rightful bodies. Is that-a clear?"

"Yes, sir, it is quite clear." Pit winked at Peach, who smiled back at him. "We'll keep everything under control."

"Okkie-dokkie.. Now, who is up for a match-a?" Silence. "Hm?"

Mario suddenly realized that the room was completely empty, and all the Smashers who had been listening were already in Master Hand's office, checking out the machine. Mario took a deep breath.

"They can-a go in it all they-a want-a. But one thing for sure-a is that unless they can-a drag me inside the machine-a in my sleep-a, they'll never see me enter that stupid piece of junk-a!"

* * *

**Wow, never thought I'd be going back and rewriting this. Let me explain why:**

**Looking back at my original version of Switched... I saw that it wasn't my best work compared to today. I've certainly improved since my first day here on Fanfiction. So, I decided to rewrite it the best I could, to make it much, much better. It isn't a completely different story, but.. well.. if you read my other version of Switched, you'll probably notice the differences and how I made it.. make more sense.**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy this better than the original, and have a good day!**

**~Moogiuh**


End file.
